spacemonk

today was ohio bicentennial day at the indians vs. reds game. as part of the festivities, as people bearing flags representing each of ohio's 88 counties, they played the pretenders "my city was gone" - a great song, to be sure, from a great band, which included ohioan chrissie hynde. although the song is about ohio - or at least certain places in ohio, anyone who has ever listened to the lyrics realizes that this song is not really complimentary to those places - so it was an odd choice. guess the suits that plan these things aren't, using their jargon, "detail oriented".

every friday i drive past a road sign that says "caution: dip in road". while, indeed, there is a dip in the road, i wonder if the signmaker doesn't giggle at his subtle insult to everyone who drives by...much like in the cover of a bc cartoon book i recall (but never read)...

not much to say. fairly ordinary day. been listening to zappa a lot lately, so i'm going to post the lyrics to one of my favorites - montana (forgive me if i've posted this one before but it bears repeating). i only own one of his 6000 or so cd's - the compilation strictly commercial and montana appears in the "single" version. who knew zappa released singles - anyhow, the killer guitar solo is criminally cut - someone at rhino records has a lot of bad karma on their head for that one. i'd like to pick up more zappa cd's but am clueless where to start - perhaps i'll let randomness be my guide a la john cage and just buy whatever they have used at the used store... as goofy as montana's lyrics are, i think of them often and i have to say i relate. anyhow, here goes...

I might be movin' to Montana soon
Just to raise me up a crop of
Dental Floss

Raisin' it up
Waxen it down
In a little white box
That I can sell uptown

By myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
But I'd be raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Well I just might grow me some bees
But I'd leave the sweet stuff
To somebody else . . . but then, on the other hand Iwould

Keep the wax
N' melt it down
Pluck some Floss
N' swish it aroun'

I'd have me a crop
An' it'd be on top (that's why I'm movin' to Montana)

Movin' to Montana soon
Gonna be a Dental Floss tycoon (yes I am)
Movin' to Montana soon
Gonna be a mennil-toss flykune

I'm pluckin' the ol'
Dennil Floss
That's growin' on the prairie
Pluckin' the floss!
I plucked all day an' all nite an' all
Afternoon . . .

I'm ridin' a small tiny hoss
(His name is MIGHTY LITTLE)
He's a good hoss
Even though
He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or
Blanket on anyway
He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or
Blanket on anyway
Any way

I'm pluckin' the ol'
Dennil Floss
Even if you think it is a little silly, folks
I don't care if you think it's silly, folks
I don't care if you think it's silly, folks

I'm gonna find me a horse
Just about this big,
An' ride him all along the border line

With a
Pair of heavy-duty
Zircon-encrusted tweezers in my hand
Every other wrangler would say
I was mighty grand

By myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
But I'd be raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss
Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Well I might
Ride along the border
With my tweezers gleamin'
In the moon-lighty night

And then I'd
Get a cuppa cawfee
N' give my foot a push . . .
Just me 'n the pygmy pony
Over the Dennil Floss Bush

N' then I might just
Jump back on
An' ride
Like a cowboy
Into the dawn to Montana

Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)

i achieved my goal of the summer to swim freestyle the length of the pool. i recognize that perhaps that doesn't sound as impressive as swimming the english channel, but for me, it was unbelievable. two years ago - terrified of the water. last year - maybe half way across. each time i've gone this summer, i am enjoying it more which no doubt is making me more comfortable and removing the mental blocks that remain allowing me to focus on swimming right. i know my technique is terribly inefficient. but it will come - i can do anything...

anyhow, the progress i am making in water and how good it feels is making me re-think the aquatic ape theory, which, btw - would be a great name for a band...

it's been real hot lately - not that i am complaining - i swear, after the winter we had, if i complain about the heat someone smack me (in a way i won't enjoy!)

had an oddly fun day yesterday.

my car had been having broake problems, which i intended to get fixed over the weekend, but didn't. my intent was to take it somewhere monday AM, get it fixed, then go into work. i got to the repair shop at about 9 and read an article about lance armstrong while they looked at it. after about an hour, they told me the bad news - it would take a couple hours to get the part in, then a couple hours to fix it - wouldn't be done to 2pm - best case. well, that killed going into work. my wife kinda had plans which she could have broken in a pinch to come by and pick me up, but i was next to a shopping mall, so i just decided to hang out and have fun. after all, although i don't believe in divine intervention - who knows, i could be wrong and if god wanted me to have a three day weekend who am i to argue with her. so, i decide like quai chang caine to wander the country side...

so i went to the mall, hung out at the bookstore.
clerk: may i help you?
me: no, my car is being fixed; i am loitering.

went to the computer store and test drove an x-box (i see an xbox or ps2 in my future - any suggestions - the game kung fu madness rules)

walked to the used record store, nothing caught my fance - aerosmith's greatest hits came closest, but what the heck, classic rock radio plays tyler et al at least a few times an hour, so why buy the cow...

at some point, i recall the movie theatre by the mall reopened. so i call home to see if my wife could read the listing - leave a message. get a haircut - the hairdresser recommends 2 fast 2 furious - i insist on the hulk - she said it wasn't playing (wrong) - she doesn't give me my penny change - prob thinking it was a tip (since when do you tip haircutters?) wife calls back - hulk is playing in about an hour - i eat lunch at a chicken wing place (garden burger w/hot sauce and a n/a beer) - make it to the movie - no whoppers so had to settle for my old fave raisinettes

the hulk rules! ang lee has a way at taking tired genres (martial arts movies, superhero movies) and breathing life into them - while clearly not as good as crouching tiger - (what movie is) this is still a great flick - good performances abound - esp. nick nolte - gruff and twisted - but not over the top - uses multi-paned screens to simulate comic books - clever...jennifer connolley (sp?) is suitable winsome - good special effects - have to question the general's strategy trying to capture the hulk and there were perhaps a few flaws, but hey - why quibble, the movie reeks of awesomeness...

later went swimming - swimming is replacing skating this year as my feel-good activity...

actually haven't felt dysfunctional for a few days...

i end with a quiz:
name the movie which is a prequel to a sequel to a movie which was a remake of a movie made 70 yrs prior.

questions from jen

1) Pamela Anderson or Julianne Moore?
in what respect? for president? as a bridge partner? as an actress?
hmmm, can i go with c. jennifer connoley (saw the hulk today - perhaps more later)
anyhow, if the question is "pamela anderson and...," i will almost always go with "and..."
i think pamela anderson is kinda scary - a parody, if you will and i kinda like julianne moore anyhow, so i'll go with her...

2) Dogs or cats?
oddly enough, though i'm a vegetarian, i'm not really an animal lover. we have 3 cats - one i like, one not so much and one i'm alternately amused and annoyed with - but i prob wouldn't have any pets, but my wife and kids like the cats, so what are you going to do...given the choice, i'll go with cats, easier to ignore...

3) Baseball or basketball?
basketball - seeing a baseball game in person is fun (going next saturday), but ither than that baseball is a bore...i can watch a basketball game even if i don't care about it cause there's at least a lot of action - not that i watch too many basketball games

4) Futurama or King of the Hill?
hmmm - don't really watch either much - i go with king of the hill for it's beavis and butthead roots - i watched futurama a few times and wanted to like it - but just didn't do it for me - seemed a bit smug and forced as opposed to the simpsons where the same kind of humor seems natural...

5) Moby or Johnny cash?
wow - perhaps the first time i've heard those two linked in any way - i am mind boggled how to answer this as i don't even think of them as doing the same thing - i guess i'd give moby the edge, although we always used to listen to cashes prison album at my old job and whoop it up...

and don't apologize about the questions jen (though these suspiciously look like from the this or that tues archive), but , hey, they gave me something to write about...

plans to turn this into a log of my vh1 viewing have been cancelled. i saw a bit of celine dion's vegas show and it was unspeakable awful. all i can do is quote kurtz "the horror, the horror"

anyhow, we saw dave matthews band yesterday. i'm not a big fan, but my wife likes them. they're ok in limited doses. it was at an outdoor venue and we had lawn seats - not necessarily the best environment to actually hear and see the show -= but it was a beautiful night. the opening band sounded exactly like one would expect the opener for the dmb to sound like. dm introduced them and his laconic speech patterns prompted the guy behind me to say "he's either high or retarded" - actually the people watching was a lot of fun. a good number of people took the occasion as an opportunity to wander around talking on their mobile phones trying to find their friends. dumbasses. a girl a few blankets over was vomiting during the opening acts' FIRST SONG. youngsters. need to learn how to pace themselves. a guy behind me - as described by my wife as "an aging pretty boy" in an ohio state t-shirt kept taunting a guy a few feet up in a michigan tee-shirt - periodically yelling "hey wolverine" and "how about them buckeyes" - kind of obnoxious, but kind of funny too. i swore i thought i saw a ufo - turned out to be an inflatable alien head. i was pretty high up there. anyhow, i must be getting old, as a highlight for me was that we were able to get out of the parking lot quickly. it was a beautiful night - suprising giving the craptacular weather we've been having - and a nice time.

on to the pool today, finally, summer....

though starting today (or is it tomorrow) the days will start to get shorter - how sad is that. busy day - hope to get to the pool, go to yoga and cut the grass - also rented TWO WEEKS NOTICE - but i have it for a week, so don't need to see it tonight...